Gritty trust takes me places I do not want to go. All the while there is a pebble in my shoe, and my heart feels wrapped in sandpaper.

Dearest Reader,

Spring is teasing the south with sunshine and warmth. My body responds with a resounding, “Thank you!”

The first pair of mourning doves has shown up beneath our bird feeder scratching sunflower seeds and speaking their love language. I could while away hours watching them.

I’m beyond ready to turn the page on this chapter. It is taking me from simply trusting to clinging, begging, and wrestling. Habakkuk keeps me company in the dark hours.

Is it just me, or have you noticed that we are never asked to trust in comfortable places?

God has a way of taking us to the end of ourselves that we might turn to Him.

I am learning it is less about me and more about Him. It is less about the “thing” and more about the process.

It’s in this process I have coined the phrase GRITTY TRUST.

Gritty trust takes me places I do not want to go. All the while there is a pebble in my shoe, and my heart feels wrapped in sandpaper.

The path is winding, the view ahead limited, and there’s that awful, frightening ledge. The unknowns feel heavy and fear shivers through my soul.

“When I am afraid, I will trust in you.”

Psalms 56:3 (CSB)

How can we move forward with that painful pebble rubbing blisters on tender places?

The scratching sound of sandpaper against my tender heart rubbing me raw. I count back the pages to the beginning of this chapter and wonder how many more? Can I walk the uncertainty with a tiny bit of Habakkuk’s faith?

“Though the fig tree does not blossom
And there is no fruit on the vines,
Though the yield of the olive fails
And the fields produce no food,
Though the flock is cut off from the fold
And there are no cattle in the stalls,
Yet I will [choose to] rejoice in the Lord;
I will [choose to] shout in exultation in the [victorious] God of my salvation!
The Lord God is my strength [my source of courage, my invincible army];
He has made my feet [steady and sure] like hinds’ feet
And makes me walk [forward with spiritual confidence] on my high places [of challenge and responsibility].”
Habakkuk 3:17-19 (AMP)

The lingering wears me thin.

There are moments when I think I can, and then, there are the moments where all I can do is wipe my salty tears.

The truth is there is no other way but to trust God.

Between gritty trust, the unknown around the bend, and the awful, frightening ledge; It is God, or it is nothing.

God is standing in the gap, wiping our tears, and offering grace. Grace in the sweet mourning doves scouring for seeds. Unshakeable faith in Habakkuk’s words.

My God is with me. Without Him, I am prone to step too close to the ledge and there I will fall into the abyss.

I will choose Him. There is no other way.

From The Wilderness Place

Your Wilderness Guide,

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I’m blessed to serve you in this place, to share with you the Gifts of Grace as I journey through the wilderness. I picture you across the table, hands wrapped tightly around your cup, sharing life, and laughter, and tears. As I share with you, my daily struggles, I long to hear what yours may be. You can do that by commenting below or reaching out to me at tlmashburn@yahoo.com. 

PS: My first book, Mornings In The Word is available now. Order your copy today.