“Faith is what makes life bearable, with all its tragedies and ambiguities, and sudden, startling joys.” 

Walking on Water by Madeleine L’Engle

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Untangling from softness, I slip quietly out of bed, tiptoe over to the windows, raising them high. Fresh air, heavy and damp, sweeps over me, warming my aching bones. Soothes me, beckoning me back to sleep.

We’ve been blessed with overcast sky and stormy evenings. Rainwater nourishes the ground, the flowers, my dry and crusty soul. Drizzle falls again today. Lamps burn low. After searing heat weighing us down in these parts, thunderstorms and soft rain lends a  lightness I have needed.

These past days have been filled with contradiction. Joy bucks against pain and the want to give in to despair. Late evening, I scrape to find the gifts.

And yet, they still come.

~Giggles surround as tinkling wind chimes when precious loves visit “Nanna Camp.”

~A new electrolyte drink recommended for P.O.T.S patients

~Rain refreshing my face while out with the dog

~Words of encouragement with a cup of tea arrive by mail 

~Heart string in the sand

~First day of middle school pictures, smiles from a growing woman~child 

~A funny story from my Soul Sister, doubling me over with belly laughter

Scraping in the dark, these are the gifts that meet me in light.

I dare not give in to the pain that darkens my life, settles deep in my bones. I fight till I’m weary and worn. I tumble into arms of Grace. Linger there, listen to the rain.

But God.

But God, my two favorite words in the Bible. Without these words, chronic illness, daily pain, fighting through it, fighting for it, becomes impossible. Hopeless even.

But God makes unbearable tremble with sudden, startling  joys.

“For I experience your wrap~around presence every moment. My heart and soul explode with joy~full of glory! Even my body will rest confident and secure.

Psalms 16: 8~9 The Passion Translation

Gifts of Grace

Tammy Mashburn 

Coming Soon Five Minute Friday: A Collection of Stories Written in Five Minutes Flat! Also, a new blog design reveal! More joys, More gifts in the hard! I am so excited for both of these gifts! 

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